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                  如何在留學文書創作中把握中西方思維差異?

                  中美網美國留學  www.usaer.net  2016-03-15    編輯: usaedit1

                  編者按:很多DIY學生到了文書環節變得一籌莫展,不知所措,是因為很多人不了解中西方截然不同的思維方式,價值觀和獨特的文化&理念,而這些恰恰是決定留學文書創作思路、角度和內容的關鍵。

                  很多DIY學生到了文書環節變得一籌莫展,不知所措,是因為很多人不了解中西方截然不同的思維方式,價值觀和獨特的文化&理念,而這些恰恰是決定留學文書創作思路、角度和內容的關鍵。

                  1. 思維方式的差異

                  比如說:西方人喜歡開門見山,最重要的先說,是直線思維的方式(Linear Thinking Mode),而我們中國人習慣迂回表達,最重要的放在最后說,是一種曲線思維方式 (Curvilinear Thinking Mode)。

                  例:In one landscaping design competition, I came to realize that the good designer did not only highly value people’s aesthetic demand for variety and originality but also emphasized on the rationality and functional features to adjust measures to the local conditions. I once engaged in a demanding renovation project, trying to design a huge, dirty garbage mountain near the 4th Ring Road in Beijing into a functional park. The garbage mountain has slopes with grades over 60 degree. The tough issue in front of us was how to design the proper routes in the garden to ensure tourists’ security. In one group discussion, I put forward that we may design the twisting hillside roads around the steep garbage mountain to reduce the climbing difficulty. Also taking account of the variety and richness of the activities in the garden, we made three unique and human-centered park routes for driving all-terrain vehicles, riding bicycles and hiking. At the crossing point of three different roads, we planned to build the overpass to ensure the safety of tourists and maximum of the space. (中國人往往喜歡將劃線段落放在最后一段來總結。但是招生官閱讀文章的時間很短,首段或段首的表達尤其需要注意。這個規律同樣可以在TOFEL和GRE作文范文中直觀體現到。)

                  The realm of finance is where my overwhelming interest lies and my long-cherished aspiration establishes. I could not forget my confusions or surprises when racking my brain for days, figuring out the strategies to make use of the ups and downs of stock market either in ”Trader Cup” Investment Simulation Competition or in China Galaxy Securities Company Ltd. I could not forget my excitement and fulfillment when using my financial knowledge to handle the difficulties I encountered in People’s Bank of China, Yanjiao Branch. I could not forget my ardent yearning to be fostered in your practice-oriented Finance program that is well tailored to me when visiting your websites. All these feelings direct me to keep stride forward on the road of finance and fulfill myself in the investment risk and risk control one day. (開篇第一段。目的明確堅定。因為會計研究生項目的實踐性很強,很多申請者都是為了更好的就業,所以,開門見山提目標很值得借鑒。(注:李同學UIUC金融研究生錄取。我還清楚地記得學生結束面試后第一時間打電話告訴我面試官明確提出她的文書非常精彩,對她印象深刻!)

                  2.價值觀的差異

                  英美人思想中實用主義價值觀占主導地位。他們注重事物的客觀性,強調事實和真理。在語言表達中非?粗匦畔⒌臏蚀_性,客觀性和具體性。而我們中國人非常講究中庸之道,語言表達上很多“一些,大致,很多,過幾天,差不多”這樣含糊的詞匯。了解到這一點,我們在文書創作中在表達上稍微注意下,就會有很好的效果。

                  例:I made sound performance in academics, ending up with high scores of some required courses. [Top X%? in class or in department? which year? 這里的high很模糊,讀者不清楚high指的是班里還是系里排名,Some課程具體指哪些課程?在哪一年?]寫出來會不會一目了然,進而體現你的專業過硬?必修課有哪些只有自己清楚,錄取委員很可能不會為了清楚了解這一點而去查你的成績單必修課有哪些。做一個細心體貼的創作者。] 其實,文書中到處都會涉及到這些細節問題,你注意到了,你的文章也就更讓真實可信,更有說服力。

                  例:In your ** program, I can also widen my horizon and expand my way of thinking, which will definitely help with solving cases, particularly foreign cases. [through doing what? HOW you will widen my horizon and expand my way of thinking? 這里句子中缺細節,表達的信息不夠充分,有種說半句含半句的感覺,沒有針對對方項目特色展開來說,對方不清楚你是否了解該項目,是否真心喜歡該校。所以,文書中注重客觀事實很重要。]

                  3. 獨特的理念&文化

                  西方人文化價值里強調自我,推崇個人奮斗,他們強調的“美國夢“就是個人英雄主義的最好體現。中國人集體意識比較強,從小就學會要有集體榮譽感,追求民族的團結和社會的和諧!爸袊鴫簟苯^對是集體夢想的體現。我們在語言表達方面喜歡從更高,更宏觀的角度思考問題 可很多學生往往寫個人陳述時,從很大的角度入手,籠統泛泛地談對某個行業的認識(尤其是本身對行業沒有獨到或深入見解直接使用百度搜集的信息)時,很失敗。但如果結合自己的真實經歷,從一個小點入手,逐步深入,會更精彩。

                  例:The inspiring and exhilarating speech on the expectation for the youth delivered by UN secretary general, Ban Ki-moon at ******** University infected and touched me profoundly while I was learning there as a visiting student. It remains fresh in my memory how he highlighted that our young generation is supposed to be helpful global citizens, being closely concerned with the world’s problems, adjusting ourselves to new ideas and circumstances around us and trying to energetically seek solutions together. Here, I cannot help thinking of one of the passions of Bertrand Russell-his unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind. This great man’s genuine and passionate love for people far and beyond thelinesinstilled in many the outlook for a better world. Though neither can I bring remarkable changes to people in materials nor can I bring people something thought-provoking in soul, one thing is certain: I will keep making efforts to help others and achieve my life meaning in behavior, making a difference to others’ lives. In fact, I have already embarked on devoting my time to the public sector and will try to continue in my lifelong career path. (這種結合自我經歷,娓娓道來,更讓人了解了你經歷的同時也了解了你的思想。) 注:楊同學 MPP/MPA 錄取院校: University of Chicago, Brown, USC, Cornell, NYU, Georgetown, University of Maryland, University of Pittsburgh)

                  而且,中國特色表達還有大而空的特點。這尤其在推薦信中注意!想想你中小學的老師評語,語言干練,抽象成套路。要知道那些評語是老師基于對你長期的觀察和了解。但是對你一無所知的招生官讀起這些大而空的表揚,會不會不相信?他們更喜歡通過一些實例或故事來親身感受你的某些優秀特質。先考慮你希望在對方面前樹立什么樣的形象。 獨立?個性?優秀?有想法?找好切入的角度后來安排你的故事。

                  例:I’d like to focus on *****’s strong abilities of investigation and analysis. Till now, I still clearly remembered that he once served as the team leader in Bird Appreciation Project (ecologic project) along Dongting Lake. He was absorbed in taking the soil samples, measuring soil species richness and making clear of the ecologic condition. And **** gave us a wonderful presentation in the end. I think that the capable youth will also perform well in the future surveys or researches. (這個例子就很好。有理有據!這是張同學申請文書中的段落,被Emory University 本科統計錄取)

                  再有,中英屬于兩種截然不同的語系,中國特色的語言表達或獨特的文化在語言中有各種體現,我們有義務解釋給讀者。

                  例:

                  To pursue more in-depth biological knowledge, I entered Tongji University, Project 211 & 985 University granted by the government funds to research in China. [What are Project 211 and 985? To a foreigner who may not be familiar with China, it’s a bit confusing! 當你不確定如何準備傳達特色詞匯的信息時,推薦參照維基百科或業內慣用的表達方式會好些。這里需要提醒的是,中國博大精深的成語,歇后語,格言等在表達的時候一定要注意它真正的含義,盡量將涉及到的中國文化等做適當解釋]

                  “知己知彼,方能百戰不殆!”從根本上了解了中西方的差別后,我想你大概清楚怎樣才能寫好一篇好文書了。

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